Danish counselor warns of grandparental burnout

So says Danish Lola Jensen. The 66-year-old family therapist has worked with families for over 39 years. In that time, she has seen grandparents' role in their grandchildren's lives increase. This is positive on the one hand, but on the other, grandparents need to be careful, according to Jensen. "For example, when a small event cannot occur in the child's life without the entire network being notified via pictures and text on social media."

In an interview with Denmark's Kristeligt Dagblad, Jensen says he encounters parents who want the perfect picture for their child. "But precisely because they make such high demands on themselves, in some cases, they become insecure. In that situation, some grandparents watch with increased concern how families can burn together when the father and mother push themselves. Then they think they have to help."

It is, therefore, no longer strange these days when a grandmother moves in with the family for a while during the birth of a child or even attends the birth. According to Jensen, parents and grandparents have never been more concerned about providing the best for their children. And that creates high pressure.

According to Jensen, grandparents should start the conversation with their children. In it, they can share expectations and express concerns. In addition, Jensen stresses that grandparents should not compare themselves to others. It is important to refrain from being subject to what others are doing or to feel that you have to offer all kinds of trips and entertainment to the child. Children see through this quickly. A day may come when the child says: 'I like to be with grandma because we don't have to do anything there'".