Mother's column – Marks make life beautiful

Wabi sabi brings into mind my first car. Because I would have to drive many kilometres for my work, I looked for a vehicle fuelled by LPG. And since my career had just started, the purchase should not be too expensive either.

My search ended with a twenty-year-old BMW. It even happened to have sports rims, a lowered bumper, and cool mirrors (that were so small that you could barely see anything behind you). That the seat covers were worn to a thread, and the fact that tape had to hold one of the signalling lights together, I had to take for granted. Even as the many scratches and dents in the metallic burgundy paintwork.

Neline is married and the mother of five: Martha (8), Abel (6), Jolijn (5), Reinout (3) and Sifra (0).

I bought this car when I was dating Jan. If I visited him over the weekend, I drove with my large tires over scary roads where one can only pass oncoming cars at certain places.

We weren't a logical match, the sporty BMW and the shy Reformed girl. Yet that weird, damaged care remains my first love. Unfortunately, Jan and I had to find another car shortly after our wedding. Expensive bills came raining down, and it was wiser to quit at some point. Currently, we drive a decent, reliable Toyota. It is a seven-seater made out of light materials to bring its usage down.

At first, it felt too luxurious to drive a sparkling bolide. But soon, the first dent became a fact. Because of a crying child in the backseat, I forgot to look back during reverse parking. The parked Land Rover into which I crashed would not budge, but our lightweight bumper got an ugly tear.

A year later, Jolijn tried out whether one could use sidewalk chalk on cars. Another lesson: using sidewalk chalk on cars results in scratches. Beautiful long lines from the front to the back of the vehicle - marked for life.

With a bit of patience, everything becomes wabi sabi. Happy is he who sees the beauty of it.